Why It’s So Hard To Let Things Go… And Why You Should Do It Anyway

let things go

It can be the hardest thing in the world to let go of things, you know?

Even things that are terrible, life-dragging and soul sucking.

The manic boss, the horrible relationship, the old clothes, the piles of bad memories and junk-  all have a tendency to stick around even after we say- swear- promise- plead, even- that we are are done with them.

Why?

It makes no sense, you know?

I’ve often only figured out why after I’ve forced myself- or have been forced- to let things go. 

let things go

At some point, negativity weighs on us all to the point where it flips us into our own dark place.

You know what I mean… its the teacher who berates you and tells you that you’re stupid until, yes, you start to believe it and prove it and live it.

It’s the same as the parents who tell you that you’ll amount to nothing, the narcissists who only love on their terms but leave you flailing in the wind waiting for more love… Until soon you have no motivation and feel unlovable, broken and smaller.

The toxic stuff affects us all, even if we are steeling ourselves against it. Even if we are experts at adversity, tough cookies and real warriors, toxic stuff gets the best of us.

Dark thoughts, words and actions that fill the space around us also fill us. They hang over our heads and they do harm in sometimes subtle and often very intense ways.

You see it pile up sometimes, but often it happens so slowly you can’t notice until its a crisis situation.

The toxic stuff piles up as blocks in relationships, love, money, health…

It also piles up as clutter, junk, chaos, disorder and bad habits that pull you down.

What I’ve come to understand for myself is that even if I don’t know why at first that I’ve specifically attracted bad situations, negativity, chaos or blocks… I do know that there’s a way to clear them.

Empowerment.

Every time you give away a bit of power to someone or something that is toxic, it’s that much harder to let go of that toxic thing.  Weird but always true in my experience.

After all, you’ve now invested in it. The five years you sunk into a job that is thankless, the ten years you spent building a marriage with someone who diminishes you… It’s been an investment.  Someone took your energy that you gave, even though it was painful to give it. Maybe if you hang out long enough the energy will come back in some way as a reward? Maybe you just have to hang on? Maybe if you throw away those clothes from very bad memory days that you’ll need them one day and they’re one-of-a-kind so you cant replace them, right?

Instead of seeing the rationalizations come true, typically the blocks grow stronger and the crazy sense of attachment grows.  The pile of clutter becomes harder to clear.  You find ways to hide it more cleverly.  I’ve seen incredible walls of shelving that look magnificently organized in beautiful bins that contain rumbling, ever-present messes stuffed away gorgeously.

Just because its out of sight doesn’t mean it’s out of mind.

It’s quite the opposite.

Free-floating anxiety, irrational anger, inability to confront things… mood swings, tantrums, big messes… all can be the product of sweeping stuff under a rug rather than airing it out and letting it go.

Empowerment is awesome in how it can undo the situation.

If you can feel good enough to start the process of clearing clutter, you take a bit of your power back with each step forward. If you really commit with heart and soul- or seek support along the way- you can clear enough of the junk and chaos in your physical space to start feeling free and alive again.

Empowerment grows with each step forward.

I spent years clearing and re-designing my own space to regain my feeling of “Dana” after my own sense of self dwindled-to-dust in years of avoiding things, chaos, neglect and subsequent disorder and clutter.

Have you been there, staring at your life and wondering exactly what happened to get to this place?

It doesn’t matter why at the moment, in my experience.  It just matters that you take a step, and then another, and another… and start letting things go that are weighing you down, no matter how hard each step may seem.

Last year I put my years of feng shui and organization to the test to create an online group to de-clutter homes and lives that have been stuck for too long.  It was an experiment.  So many people signed up to go on the first eight week ride I was awe-struck.  I know the material itself always works… but I didn’t know if a group would work…

Empowerment was amplified like a force of Nature.

Every day I found myself crying, laughing and even more intensely clearing my own life of stuff alongside the group in the Catalyst Camp.  People found lost talents, lost hope, lost money, new jobs, new homes, new courage…

And we all – yes we, since I did it along with everyone!- made space for the new.

It’s my personal mission with all this feng shui to help you take steps toward your own home empowerment.  In my experience, that action of clearing clutter equals life empowerment.  It moves things forward. It unlocks the stuck flows.

You can always ask me questions.

You can even start doing this on your own right now, of course, too!

If you take even one step toward more organization, more personal light, more self-love, a cleaner house… you’ll have that much more power to let go of anything that weighs you down.  You’ll be that much more free.  This momentum alone can transform your life.

xoxo Dana

P.S. : The Catalyst Camp is coming for the New Year to open up your life to the new like never before! It’s 8 weeks of de-cluttering, letting things go any lightening up life in radical ways.  You can sign up HERE to start the free 3-video series & revolutionize your clutter clearing.

 

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feng shui 101And, if you want to dive in to your own personalized feng shui in a modern, practical way, Say hello to Feng Shui 101.  Its the guide I made for you to create your own personalized feng shui at home, in the office, wherever you may be… in 8 weeks.  It’s not filled with strict rules or what you “must” do.  Its filled with information, questions, exercises and even videos and classes to help you confidently create amazing spaces with killer feng shui and live with more flow.   Learn more about the 8-week feng shui adventure & grab your copy to get started right HERE…  And, as always, please let me know what happens!

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